As I was driving home from the grocery store the other day, I realized that I'm exactly where I want to be. This is the chapter of my life I've been waiting for. I have everything I have always wanted. As I realized it, a great song came on the radio and a glint of sunlight reflected off my ring and I reflected on what it symbolizes. I didn't necessarily grow up believing in marriage, I knew it was what I wanted eventually but I didn't really know what to expect from it and I didn't necessarily feel that mine would last forever. Obviously these feelings changed before I made the commitment with Jared, but that's where I came from.
As Jared and I started moving towards engagement, I realized that he wasn't what I expected. He was more...a lot more. I knew he would be faithful to me. I knew he would be an amazing father. I knew he would protect me and take care of me and make me feel special. I knew our marriage would work. My past was something we overcame together both on our own as a couple and in pre-marital counseling. When we got married I had a completely different outlook and we were happy. Now when I look at my ring, I think of our lives together. I think of standing in that chapel and making promises to him in front of our friends and families. I think of my best friend sitting next to me on the couch watching the Office, resting his hand on my pregnant stomach, patiently waiting to feel our son kick. I think of getting gray hair together, of bringing him cool washcloths when he doesn't feel good, and laughing. I'm so glad he picked me and that he made those promises and intends to keep them.
As I drove on, Paxton started babbling in the back seat and I acknowledged another layer of my happiness. We have a son that gets all of our attention when he's awake. He has so much love, he is surrounded by people that love him and will drop anything to spend time with him. Our families don't miss his milestones. They are here to watch his first few steps, to marvel at his first few smiles and to celebrate birthdays and to direct his path. He's ours. I get to be the first person he sees every morning. I have a carseat in my back seat and baby toys all over my living room and I couldn't be happier. This is the season of life I have always looked forward to. This is what I envisioned when I tried to imagine my adult life.
I have my dream job, we are working to buy the house we became a family in, we have pets that frustrate us to no end, but we love them anyway.
I know that we have more to look forward to. So many memories, maybe more kids, moves, new cars...life; but I don't know how anything can be as sweet as these moments as a happy family of three. We have everything.
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