Thursday, April 13, 2017

Last Day With My Last Baby

I've been dreading this day for two solid weeks now and it's last day with a baby. Tomorrow this sweet little guy turns one and I'm not ready!

I've had two other babies turn one and I know that tomorrow nothing will be different. He'll be the tiniest fraction of a centimeter taller and weigh a quarter of an ounce more, but he will feel the same. He won't suddenly learn new skills or speak in sentences, but I will know that according to all sources, he's a toddler. And I'm not ready.

But ready or not, this soft and sweet bundle of snuggles will wake up tomorrow and he will be bigger and I can't stop it. They say parenting is learning to let go and I am resisting. This is what I have always wanted, a house full of babies and toddlers and tiny kids and I have it. I can't imagine anything sweeter. They always want to snuggle, they smell so good, they don't love anybody like they love their mama. So today I'll be snuggling him. I gave him an extra bath after lunch so he would smell extra good and his hair is extra fluffy. We went to Target and the P's each picked him out a present and we laughed because he watched them pick each thing out and had no idea what they were for. Next year he'll know.

This next year will be fun. He'll learn to walk, his speech will take off, he'll figure out how to play at the park and decide which foods are his favorite. He'll even have some time as an only child while the P's are both at school. I will do my best to be mindful every day about how these moments are fleeting and if time could slow down a little, that would be great.

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